You are at a resteraunt and you see your friend's gf/bf with someone else. They look cozy. Do you tell? Its rumored your friend's gf/bf is messing around . It comes from a good source . Do you tell? If you find out your bf/gf was cheating and your friends knew would u be mad at them for not telling?
I'd be so pissed. I have a relationship of honesty with my friends and they would want to be told that their partner is cheating, just as I would want to know.
About a month ago, the woman (Angi) on the morning radio show I listen to, had a similar dilemma. A friend of hers (we'll call her Vicki) text Angi saying that the husband of a mutual friend (we'll call her Brittney) was in a bar by himself, saw her and a friend, came over, bought them drinks and talked and flirted. Vicki asked Angi if she should tell Brittney. Vicki had only met Brittney's husband once or twice before and Vicki couldn't believe that Brittney's husband didn't recognize her. So, Angi put it out to radioland and asked if she should say something to her friend, Brittney, about it. I immediately thought to myself, she needs to stay out of it because this is all hearsay. She didn't witness this at all. Angi decided not to say anything. And it's a good thing she didn't say anything to Brittney about it. A couple of weeks later, Vicki told Angi that she saw the same guy in the bar and it WASN'T Brittney's husband. And to think what could have happened to Brittney's marriage if one of the friends said something. It's a touchy situation, no doubt, but I would think, unless you catch someone actually in the act, then I'd stay out of it.
I'm not saying anything, it's none of my business. There are probably issues on the home front anyway that would and or could tip them off, they don't need me. I don't want to be that gossipy muthufucka...I Am the Cone of Silence...plus I don't want to be an accessory to murder.
There are ways a telling about someone without snitching specific details. I was dating a girl one time who lived about 500 miles in a different city and sometimes I'd call on Friday and Saturday nights and couldn't reach her until like 2AM or 3AM in the morning. We used to fight about where she was I why she couldn't let me know she was out or whatever. BTW she almost always gave the lame answer she was out with friends from work.lol One day I was talking to her roommate about my stress in the relationship and should this girl and I be more casual and less exclusive, and her roommate gave me this knowing stare for a couple seconds and said, 'You should do whatever you want to do.' That was it. It wasn't like she was hitting on me or trying to break us up. But she was trying to TELL ME about other shit that was going on without going into details. This was my ex-GF's bestie for life who told me this, so her comment was double-barrel loaded with unspoken meaning. I got the message.
This is the exact reason when I did dirt in the past, I wouldn't even tell my own father. You think your boys got cha back, you think ya girl got cha back, nope, they all have a conscience that ways on them, especially when it's not their own situ, or they are jealous for whatever reason. Keep your shit to yourself, like the deepest cover CIA agent, delta force, NSA, spy, spook muthufucka. Also, I'm not lying for anyone else, keep your shit away from me so I have deniable plausibility.
Depends on my level of friendship with them. If I saw my bff's husband with someone else, damn sure I'm texting her pictures right then and there. If it's a casual friend/acquaintance...I'll be minding my own business. If I don't know the ins and outs of their relationship, I won't get involved in their issues.
Good point, I didn't even think of that aspect. By the way, that video is too long for email and I can't shorten it, I'll jus send the pic.
For me it definitely depends on the relationship with the alleged cheater and the significant other. Ideally, I'd want to inform the other person or at least send a subtle hint. My caution would come in if it's a case that could be innocent, and the fact that sometimes... The other person is less than receptive to that kind of news, and may direct their venom at you.
This^^^ I tried telling a casual friend years ago,,, it back fired in my fucking face. If it's not 1 of about 5 people in my circle, fuck em.
In all honesty, I don't know how to answer. I have seen so many so-called "true friends" incite disharmony in a couple, only to swoop in and claim the dissatisfied girlfriend for himself, that I probably would not trust the claim that the gf was getting 'cozy'.
If it's a close friend of mines then I am telling. I am snapping closeup pics of his gf and her date on my phone and sending it to my friend! Then I might even go up to her and say "Hey Jessica, how's Chris doing?" Then walk off!