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I heard one of the most disturbing stories ever yesterday.

A family that my family has known for almost 30 years did something to their only child that blows my mind. My parents met these people is when they hired my mama to babysit their son.

His mother had a difficult pregnancy & almost lost him because of it. Due to some of the problems she had, he was born with a mild case of mental retardation & a few physical problems...the physical issues did not incapacitate him in any way & most of them went away as he got older. Because she almost lost him & was unable to conceive anymore children, she babied him & isolated him from most people as much as possible because she was still afraid of "losing him".

It was obvious he was on the slow side, but other than that he had no serious issues except for his mother. The way he was raised him crippled him in so many ways it blows my mind. Due to his isolation he has no social skills & the only place he's allowed to go alone is to my parents' house to visit. The rest of the time he is with his parents (mostly his mother). He would've had a fairly normal life if he'd been allowed to do so.

What I found out yesterday shocked the hell out of me. When he was 20 (he's 30 now), his mother took him to a "counselor" who talked him into signing an "agreement" that stated he would never try to have a girlfriend so he could never reproduce & then she had him sterilized to further insure he couldn't conceive children. This is so sick & disturbing to me & it breaks my heart that someone would do such a thing to their own child. Yes, he's slow, but he's still a person who deserves to have a full life. IMO this is abuse. To take your own child to be fixed like you would a damn dog is insanity to me. His parents are some fucked up people.
 
we always say that bw and wm that come here are pathetic pot stirrers...so if bm and ww go to their sites doesn't that make us the same...quite frankly i don't have the time to worry about what bw/wm have to say...too busy doing me:D
 
Link please!!!

I was surfing the web and came across a BW/WM IR blog. One of the comments was from a BW who claimed she lurked here. She singled me out as the "Number One Black Woman Hater" on this board and said I was--and I quote--"The most intelligent (and vicious) of the buffoons over there."

I'd share a link but there's no way to link to the individual comment and there were like a zillion.

Now "buffoon" aside, I take it as a great compliment to be called "intelligent and vicious." :D

And the other commenters, instead of joining in the bash-fest, questioned why she was on a site called whitewomenblackmen in the first place, she must have been looking to be offended. I thought that was funny...and hopeful.

So thank you Ms. Lurker!

:D
 
I heard one of the most disturbing stories ever yesterday.

A family that my family has known for almost 30 years did something to their only child that blows my mind. My parents met these people is when they hired my mama to babysit their son.

His mother had a difficult pregnancy & almost lost him because of it. Due to some of the problems she had, he was born with a mild case of mental retardation & a few physical problems...the physical issues did not incapacitate him in any way & most of them went away as he got older. Because she almost lost him & was unable to conceive anymore children, she babied him & isolated him from most people as much as possible because she was still afraid of "losing him".

It was obvious he was on the slow side, but other than that he had no serious issues except for his mother. The way he was raised him crippled him in so many ways it blows my mind. Due to his isolation he has no social skills & the only place he's allowed to go alone is to my parents' house to visit. The rest of the time he is with his parents (mostly his mother). He would've had a fairly normal life if he'd been allowed to do so.

What I found out yesterday shocked the hell out of me. When he was 20 (he's 30 now), his mother took him to a "counselor" who talked him into signing an "agreement" that stated he would never try to have a girlfriend so he could never reproduce & then she had him sterilized to further insure he couldn't conceive children. This is so sick & disturbing to me & it breaks my heart that someone would do such a thing to their own child. Yes, he's slow, but he's still a person who deserves to have a full life. IMO this is abuse. To take your own child to be fixed like you would a damn dog is insanity to me. His parents are some fucked up people.

Is retardation hereditary?
 
I heard one of the most disturbing stories ever yesterday.

A family that my family has known for almost 30 years did something to their only child that blows my mind. My parents met these people is when they hired my mama to babysit their son.

His mother had a difficult pregnancy & almost lost him because of it. Due to some of the problems she had, he was born with a mild case of mental retardation & a few physical problems...the physical issues did not incapacitate him in any way & most of them went away as he got older. Because she almost lost him & was unable to conceive anymore children, she babied him & isolated him from most people as much as possible because she was still afraid of "losing him".

It was obvious he was on the slow side, but other than that he had no serious issues except for his mother. The way he was raised him crippled him in so many ways it blows my mind. Due to his isolation he has no social skills & the only place he's allowed to go alone is to my parents' house to visit. The rest of the time he is with his parents (mostly his mother). He would've had a fairly normal life if he'd been allowed to do so.

What I found out yesterday shocked the hell out of me. When he was 20 (he's 30 now), his mother took him to a "counselor" who talked him into signing an "agreement" that stated he would never try to have a girlfriend so he could never reproduce & then she had him sterilized to further insure he couldn't conceive children. This is so sick & disturbing to me & it breaks my heart that someone would do such a thing to their own child. Yes, he's slow, but he's still a person who deserves to have a full life. IMO this is abuse. To take your own child to be fixed like you would a damn dog is insanity to me. His parents are some fucked up people.

I have heard of this before. Not knowing his degree of retardation it could be herediary factors, protecting him from others taking advantage of him emotionally or sexually or maybe the parents/Dr concluded he would not be mentally able to care for any offspring.

I saw all kinds of things in one of my jobs. I did govt. contractual/financial. Part of my job had to do with court orders and payments from the court. I would sometimes read the documentation on people on court orders and people who were made wards of the court. Some people have really sad lives and aren't able to function within society.
 
So I got an IM from a 23 years old female today. I'm thinking, "hmmm maybe the old me is coming back, I'll be hooking up with ladies again"

Then it turned out she was just inviting me to watch her webcam show:smt013 I used to be so good at meeting women, maybe I still am, I'm just lazy
Get your lazy bum outside in the fresh air :p I'm sure you haven't lost any ability, but maybe a little confidence? Gogogo, it's always hardest the first time in a while, but then you'll be back to form asap.

Horrible story, Tam :( Not sure how they'd get consent for that if he's only mildly retarded? Or they just pressured him into it do you think? Horrible either way.
 
Is retardation hereditary?

Like Archangel said, it can be, but it wasn't in this case. There was an issue during the delivery & he was deprived of oxygen for a short time.

I have heard of this before. Not knowing his degree of retardation it could be herediary factors, protecting him from others taking advantage of him emotionally or sexually or maybe the parents/Dr concluded he would not be mentally able to care for any offspring.

I saw all kinds of things in one of my jobs. I did govt. contractual/financial. Part of my job had to do with court orders and payments from the court. I would sometimes read the documentation on people on court orders and people who were made wards of the court. Some people have really sad lives and aren't able to function within society.

His was an extremely mild degree & in his case not at all hereditary. He had some behavioral issues when his parents were around, but when my mother kept him, his behavior was pretty typical for his age.

I've heard of the types of cases like the ones you're talking about. I'd hate to be in the position of having to make that decision.

It can be but not in this case. It was trying to get the child out in labour that did the damage. no genes. or at least that is my guess.

Good guess.
 
Horrible story, Tam :( Not sure how they'd get consent for that if he's only mildly retarded? Or they just pressured him into it do you think? Horrible either way.

I don't know how they were able to do it. I don't know if it's still the case, but it used to be that in Texas, you had to be 21 to consent to sterilization. The whole thing is horrible to me.
 
Get your lazy bum outside in the fresh air :p I'm sure you haven't lost any ability, but maybe a little confidence? Gogogo, it's always hardest the first time in a while, but then you'll be back to form asap.

Horrible story, Tam :( Not sure how they'd get consent for that if he's only mildly retarded? Or they just pressured him into it do you think? Horrible either way.

Easy for women to say when they aren't the ones who have to completely open themselves up for rejection smdh lol
 
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