Cheaters

paniro187 said:
i think it's the biggest cop out to try the "we are wired this way" excuse. To me it's just being lazy and not trying to find someone you really match up with and rather just hop from relationship to relationship because it's what YOU want to do. Nothing wrong with that but by golly let's not sail the whole institution of marriage up the river because you can't find anyone to keep your attention.
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This.
 
paniro187 said:
i think it's the biggest cop out to try the "we are wired this way" excuse. To me it's just being lazy and not trying to find someone you really match up with and rather just hop from relationship to relationship because it's what YOU want to do. Nothing wrong with that but by golly let's not sail the whole institution of marriage up the river because you can't find anyone to keep your attention.
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But something IS wrong with marriage. As an institution. IMO.
Look at divorce rates. If it was working the rates would prove that.
So it's either the institution itself or the people who are flawed or it's both.
Even so, it's much easier to change the laws (and marriage is law) to reflect human behavior in this case. Vice versa is not working.
 
Well, let me ask you this...what happened that caused your marriage to crumble and wane away?

paniro187 said:
i think it's the biggest cop out to try the "we are wired this way" excuse. To me it's just being lazy and not trying to find someone you really match up with and rather just hop from relationship to relationship because it's what YOU want to do. Nothing wrong with that but by golly let's not sail the whole institution of marriage up the river because you can't find anyone to keep your attention.
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I still have a lot of respect for you, regardless of your past consequences. But, it's one thing to actually say it, and another thing to act on it. So, I can only by your word since you seem sincere here.

However, I want to know more about your cheating past...if you choose to share it. I think you're pretty much proving a point on the how marriage in of itself is broken or the dynamics behind it. I can understand your previous post and it makes a lot of sense, due to societal and psychological conditioning. But you're still a human being with the need to eat, sleep, shit, and fuck. And with you felt "stuck" waking up to the same person each and everyday, your dick tingled for "fresh meat." So I have to ask you the following...

Why did you cheat?

How many times did you cheat?

What happened during the course of your marriage that made you commit infidelity?

paniro187 said:
I was a immature piece of shit cheater that didn't appreciate a good thing what's your point. I have learned from that mistake immensely and will never do that shit again.
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Alinoa said:
But something IS wrong with marriage. As an institution. IMO.
Look at divorce rates. If it was working the rates would prove that.
So it's either the institution itself or the people who are flawed or it's both.
Even so, it's much easier to change the laws (and marriage is law) to reflect human behavior in this case. Vice versa is not working.
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Well Alinoa, to be fair divorce stats can be manipulated http://www.divorcereform.org/nyt05.html

Check out the divorce rate in Massachusetts, http://www.divorce.com/blog/cdc-repo...t-divorce-rate same as it was in 1940, very low, what have they figured out that others have not?

IMO it is not the institution of marriage that is the problem, but what the two people in the marriage are bringing to it, and how much they nurture it and each other through the years.
 
Okay, fair enough. I think at this point we can keep this on a mutual area.

By the way, I like that you took your time to explain yourself. Again, you're more and more likable in my book, despite some heated disagreements.

paniro187 said:
remember that personal responsibility stuff i preach in other threads?? it also applies to me. it had nothing to do with being hard wired to want other women or whatever it had to do with not being mature enough to keep my dick in my pants instead of coming home to my wife. PLain and simple. I don't make excuses for myself nor will pass the blame on anyone or anything else it was a conscious decision I made. if it was now I wouldn't do it. but that's part of growing up.

If we start down this road of being "hard wired" then we might as will start embracing that blacks are "hard wired" towards certain behaviors and whites are this way and Hispanics that way and etc. and no i don't believe in that. I believe in personal choices and owning your decisions.
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JordanC said:
Anytime I have lost interest in someone sexually then there were other things wrong in the relationship. So probably best you just ended it. :smt102
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You got it. If I've lost interest in my partner sexually, it's because I've checked out emotionally. Biggest warning sign that a relationship is in trouble!
 
goodlove said:
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2012/05/24/drew-taylor-prostitute-cheating-men.cnn

she stated a man wants to feel special....hhhmmm it sounds like what women say when they cheat.
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........If you ever have a mental lapse and sleep with a prostitute.....Everything should be bleached before you go back to your lady.....Everything from your vows to your scrotum.........
When you sleep with hundreds of men, you inherit their history of risks, coupled with super strains of germs and calloused emotions..... Even for a secret frill, how can you share your joy with that.......
 
whikle said:
JordanC said:
Anytime I have lost interest in someone sexually then there were other things wrong in the relationship. So probably best you just ended it.
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You got it. If I've lost interest in my partner sexually, it's because I've checked out emotionally. Biggest warning sign that a relationship is in trouble!
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:smt045 cosign!
 
goodlove said:
tricking aint easy.


whats funny or not that now they are online tricking now
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Truthfully I can't blame them at all. Its time for us to grow up and acknowledge times are tough and girl who can get a 100k or more education paid for without 20 years worth of debt is smart in my book. I wish the option was available to men lol
 
The Dark Knight said:
Truthfully I can't blame them at all. Its time for us to grow up and acknowledge times are tough and girl who can get a 100k or more education paid for without 20 years worth of debt is smart in my book. I wish the option was available to men lol
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LOL. its called dating gihtfs thus being a boy toy.....whats a gihtfs? grannies i have to fuck. :D
 
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